Free-Range Parenting: Style and Its Characteristics

The concept of free-range parenting became mainstream in 2008 when Lenore Skenanzy, a New York columnist, wrote an article titled “Why I Let My 9-Year-Old Ride the Subway Alone.” Skenanzy clearly states in the article that she made sure her son could read the subway map and gave him money if he needed it. However, critics still argued that her decision bordered on child neglect.

Skenanzy started a movement to encourage parents to stop being helicopter parents. She warned about the dangers of overprotecting children and encouraged other parents to raise independent kids who can make healthy choices independently.

Over the years, many other parents have made the news for their free-range parenting approach. However, in a few instances, Child Protective Services have become involved in families where free-range parenting seems negligent.

What Is Free-Range Parenting?

Free-range parenting advocates insist this parenting style isn’t about being permissive or uninvolved. Instead, it’s about allowing kids to have the freedom to experience the natural consequences of their behavior—when it’s safe to do so. It’s also about ensuring kids have the skills needed to become responsible adults.

There isn’t always a clear answer about when a child is ready to handle mature responsibilities, like riding the subway alone. What’s considered normal in one area among parents may be considered neglect in other cities or states. There is a lot of debate over questions such as:

• At what age should a child be allowed to stay home alone?
• When is a child old enough to stay alone overnight?
• What age should a child be allowed to walk down the street alone?
• Can a child play at the park without an adult in attendance?
• At what age should an older sibling be able to supervise younger children?

While one family may allow a 7-year-old to walk to the park alone, another may still hire a babysitter for a 12-year-old. A few states have specific laws governing how old children must be left home alone or allowed to walk to school. In most states, it’s left up to parents to decide on a case-by-case basis.

Characteristics of Free-Range Parenting

Skenanzy is clear that free-range parenting isn’t about neglectful parenting. Instead, it’s about allowing kids the freedom and the opportunity to “be kids.” Here are a few of the main characteristics of free-range parenting:

• Parents allow for plenty of unscheduled activities. Rather than rushing from violin lessons to soccer practice every day, free-range parents encourage unstructured play. For example, instead of having an adult enforce many rules of a baseball game, free-range kids are encouraged to play a pick-up game with their pals in the neighborhood.
• Playing in nature is important. Free-range kids are encouraged to play outside rather than use electronics. Free-range parents want their kids to be able to amuse themselves without technology—whether it’s playing in the garden, building a fort, or riskier activities that increase resilience and independence.
• Kids earn their independence. Free-range parents allow kids to earn independence, and they gradually grant them increased freedom and responsibility. The focus is on showing kids that they can try new things and accomplish hard tasks on their own.
• Free-range parents don’t parent out of fear. While many parents enforce safety measures—like wearing a helmet while riding a bike—they also understand that accidents can happen anywhere. They allow their kids to play on the playground and try new things because they know it’s good for them, even though they may get hurt occasionally.

Undoubtedly, there are different ideas about how much freedom kids should have. While some parents feel that times have changed and allowing kids to play outdoors unattended is a bad idea, others feel like overparenting is a more real danger to a child’s development.